There are two times a year when I officially check in with myself to see how I'm doing. The first is New Year's Eve/Day and the second is my birthday.
Today is my 44th birthday. My life is nothing like what I thought it would be 25 years ago when I was becoming an official adult. That's a good thing. Mostly because 25 years ago, I really didn't have a clue about what was important to a life. I was going to have a great, important career. I was going to live in a big house and drive a hot car. My husband would be rich and handsome and my children perfect. Ha!
What I know now is that my life, if it had turned out the way I imagined back then, would have been miserable. I was married to that man, had that house and the hot car. Thank goodness there weren't any kids. I got out before I was 30, which was a blessing.
The life I have now is so much better. I have a job that doesn't pay much but I love it and look forward to going to work almost everyday. I am married to a sensitive, caring man who will never be rich but keeps life happy and interesting. I putt around town in a gas-sipping Ford Focus and live in a mobile home in the woods. My son isn't perfect, but he's happy, healthy and a blast to have around.
I am overweight but generally healthy. My doctor and I are working on the cholesterol and weight issues, trying to keep my bones from falling apart and my heart from getting out of control. I quit smoking last year and have 1 year, 1 month and 1 week under my belt as a non-smoker. I can smell things again. I can breathe when I move and finish sentences without running out of air.
My mom called, my dad emailed, my cousin sent me a card. My brothers have called to wish me a happy birthday. My husband and son baked me a cake and made dinner. I have roses and a balloon and the best life...
I am glad to be alive.