Thursday, February 08, 2007

Who the #$%^&* is Olga????

My transformation to the Dark Side? Progressing nicely, thank you.

Dark Side Anakin

I went to bed last night, wearing my earplugs, which I do from time to time. I didn't have any reason to think that I would NEED them. I actually don't like wearing them because I can't hear Z-boy if he needs me or the smoke alarm if it goes off. I don't think it's safe, but if Darling Man is home, I feel okay about wearing them.

Guess what? Party Boys WOKE ME UP WHILE I WAS WEARING THE EARPLUGS! This does not make for a happy neighbor.


In fact, I was distinctly pissed.

They were out there on the deck and in the carport YELLING. What, I don't know - too many voices yelling too many different things. Why is another mystery - though I can guess that copious amounts of alcohol were involved.

I was not fully coherent, and without thinking turned on the carport light. This was immediately followed by hushed yelling of "Oh, F***!!! Shut the hell up! Shut the F*** up!!!" in a male voice.

And out of the darkness arose a lone female voice wailing plaintively, "Olga! Olga! Speak Hungarian to me, Olga! Pleeeeeeezzeee????"

Quickly followed by the first male voice saying, "Would you SHUT THE F*** UP, bitch?"

Nice people.

Oddly enough, this was not the first plea for hungarian speech by Olga that I have heard from over there. It appears to be a recurring theme, along with take-your-shirt-off, and is-there-any-more-beer?

Anyway, my intention of calling the police was thwarted, because they have to be caught in the act. At least it was quiet for the rest of the night....

I got up relatively early and went outside. I took down all the makes, models and tag numbers of the vehicles in their yard and in the street. A couple of them were in front of my house, and there was trash in my yard - a crushed beer can, a wine bottle twist off plastic thing, and a wet roll of half unrolled paper towels. Classy.


Armed with my new information and a healthy dose in equal measure of irritation and indignation, I sat down at my computer and mulled over what action to take next.

First I found and printed out the local noise ordinances and an article from the University telling students that they must be respectful of the community. I highlighted the appropriate passages, i.e; City code prohibits obscene, profane, or indecent language as well as drunken, noisy or disorderly conduct on a city street or other public place within the city limits that disturbs public tranquility. This includes the use of amplifying devices such as home stereos, car stereos, televisions, etc. Any of these turned up to the point of disturbing the peace or annoying any person who owns or occupies property in the neighborhood is in violation of the law.

AND THIS: Actions which require police attention are parking, late night visitors, outdoor loitering, (smoking cigarettes or playing games), underage drinking, trash, unkempt yards, and loud noise. The City has a zero tolerance policy concerning noise complaints. Party hosts don't get three warnings anymore, which means that the police can and will arrest any resident who hosts a party that becomes out of control. The city attorney may even file a civil action suit against a resident who has three visits from the police withing a six-month period.

I highlighted a note out to the side: The police have been called to your residence TWICE in the last MONTH...

I made copies. Put one on their mailbox, gave one to the president of our neighborhood association, and kept a copy for myself. I will also email copies to our neighborhood police liaison. The next move is up to the "Boys".

IMG_1708 IMG_1703 IMG_1704
These are the cars of the visiting "ladies". I noticed that all of them had an Alpha Gamma insignia on the back windows. I put that bit of information to use by writing the national headquarters of the Alpha Gamma Delta sorority and informing them that at least three of their members were in imminent danger of being arrested due to their association with the "Party Boys." I wonder if anything will come of that letter. In an interesting twist, the most famous Alpha Gamma in this town is also married to the University President. Hmmmm.....

Darling Man came home from work while I was still making my diabolical plans, saw the trash by the road and picked it up, depositing it on the hood of the black car. After a while, a little girl (well, a college girl with very little sense, apparently) came out wearing only a big T-shirt, scooped the trash off her hood and back into our yard. Darling Man was standing at the door - flung it open and said in a most-scary and authoritive voice, something like "You pick that trash up, young lady and take it with you when you go." She froze, then picked up the trash and muttered, "Geez, get over it!" I said, "Get a clue," under my breath, and Darling Man who doesn't hear everything says, "What'd she say? What'd she say?!" Little T-shirt gal jumped in her car and left, and by the time I relayed her words to Darling Man, she was gone. He said it was a good thing he hadn't heard her because he'd have been out the door and in her face in a second - he doesn't like smart-ass kids either.

My last stop for the day was public records. I pulled the records of ownership on the house and discovered that one of the boys is part owner. There is a second owner who lives downstate - I'm guessing Daddy? The records came complete with addresses, so guess who will get a letter later this week?

Another little gem? Our neighbor/part-owner is a political science Major in the School of Social Studies. Hello? Dean of Students? I have a very interesting list for you.

Dark Side

Transformation is complete.


Kevin Charnas said...


Way to go...I would've never have thought of that, oh great dark lord.

Alice in Wonderbread said...


Zero tolerance here, and I'm rooting for you ALL THE WAY!

Those kids need to learn they can yes, as adults, do whatever the eff they want to do, but when their freedom encroaches on YOUR freedom, it's a violation of the law and will NOT be tolerated.

Anonymous said...

Um, the Greek letters on the back of that Infiniti are that of DELTA GAMMA, not Alpha Gamma Delta.

(FYI, I found your blog only because it appeared in a Google news/blog alert for "Alpha Gamma Delta")

Stephanie said...

Kevin stole my line!!!

Oh, and I SO admire your thoroughness!!

Note to self: don't piss off Sayre. EVAH!

Sayre said...

Sorry, Anon - the camera didn't capture the insignia very well. I wrote it down too, and checked with the university - it is Alpha Gamma Delta (which goes by Alpha Gam here).

In an interesting development, I have heard back from the sorority, which is quite dismayed by all of this and is in the process of checking their records for the three "ladies". Could we hope that some sort of action is forthcoming??? Enquiring minds want to know!

Anonymous said...

If it was Alpha Gamma dela, there would be the letter A, the letter Gamma, and a triangle. There are clearly only two letters on the Infiniti...

min said...

Good for you! Hmm...screw top wine bottles...I think I know who one of those ladies was. I'll ask Jenny if she speaks Hungarian.

Sayre said...

HA-HA-HA!!! Min. Tell Jenny she's in big trouble.

Hey, Anon - I must issue an apology to you!!!! And your sisters. I wrote the first letter down wrong - it IS a Delta. I went back and enlarged my picture and sure enough. Thank you for the catch. I will also write back to the HQ and let them know I got the wrong sorority (blushing furiously now) and apologize. The I will write the RIGHT sorority. Those girls are definitely heading down the wrong path.

Damn. My eyes are getting old.

nikki said...


sayre's first step in taking over the world is complete!!!!!

when you're done with your neighbors, i have a few whose asses you could kick too!

jedimerc said...

Nuke 'em till the glow and all that jingoisitc stuff... people like that need to have their atoms rearranged :)

Nikki said...

Oh masterful dark lord...please take me beneath your leathery wing and teach me your dark and treacherous ways so that I may one day be as good at being evil as you are.