Darling Man and I went to see a therapist for ZBoy on Thursday. She was VERY nice. We talked about what was going on with Z, and us, and everything we thought might have lead up to this. I gave her copies of my email to the teachers about the bullying and their responses. About my ongoing battle with weight. Darling Man shared a lot of his own upbringing and how that might also be affecting ZBoy and how he deals with him. It was a very interesting couple of hours (we were actually only scheduled for one hour - which goes to show that there's A LOT of baggage to unload).
ZBoy has an appointment on Monday to see her.
I cannot tell you how relieved I am that we are able to take concrete steps in helping him. She also told us to not make eating such a big deal. If we show this much concern to him, then he knows there's something to be concerned about. So, while it's not easy, we're trying to be nonchalant about his consumption of food.
We all went out to a chinese restaurant yesterday and I told the waitress that Zboy would not be visiting the buffet and did not want anything to drink. If he changed his mind, I would let her know. Then Darling Man and I proceeded to the buffet and get our food. We both came back with "meat-on-a-stick" (terryaki chicken), which we know ZBoy loves. He sat there and watched us eat it, looking more and more miserable. We ignored him. Finally, he asked if it would be okay if he went and got a plate. He got one piece of meat-on-a-stick (a big one) and came back to the table and ate it. All of it. I asked if he wanted to go back for more and he said no. So I went to get some chocolate pudding and a cookie for dessert. More eyeballing. And he asked if he could get some ice cream. I said yes, so he did.
Now I KNOW this is not the most nutritious meal in the world, but at least he ate something so I'm not complaining.
After lunch, we went bowling. This is where things got telling. ZBoy loves to go bowling, but he wore out before we were halfway through the second game. He hadn't the strength or the energy for it. Darling Man and I finished out his frames while he stood around gazing at the video games.
On the way home, we went to Barnes and Noble. DM and I took turns hanging with the Z in the children's book section while the other wandered off to find something for his or her own self. While I was with ZBoy, I looked through the books there and found this:
...and slipped it in my pile to purchase.
When we got home, I handed it to him and he read it cover to cover, making exclamations all the while about how he "...sure knew how that felt, and hmmm... I could try this!" Then he made me read it out loud so we could all hear it while he was in the tub. He seemed a lot happier after that.
Score one for Mom!