Monday, December 15, 2008

Not a Jesus-freak, but...

I suppose there are times when people would wonder.

As I drove to work this morning, I realized I wasn't in the mood for NPR or B-52s or any of my usual go-to-work entertainments. After rummaging around in my glove box at the stoplight, I came up with a Don Williams CD and a Colin Raye CD. I adore Don Williams, but he was just a bit too mellow for my mood this morning, so Colin Raye it was.

I didn't get halfway through the first song before I was losing my makeup to tears. "I Think About You" expresses the concerns of a father raising a daughter, realizing how the rest of the world will see her and how at odds it is with the way he sees her. I'm a mom. Raising a boy. The concerns are a little different but there all the same.

I quickly called my mom to talk about something, anything else in an effort to save my face for the day. A few minutes later, she was called away for breakfast and it was just me and my car again.

I pushed play on my CD and this came on:

This song never fails to bring on the tears. The cruelty with which people treat other people is astounding sometimes - especially when it is the smallest kindness that could change their lives forever.

After work, I went home and curled up on my couch to catch up on my DVR. Not in the mood for "Sex and the City" or "Shallow Hal" or even "Elf", I settled on "Touched by an Angel" which I record everyday. I saw a man wake up from a coma and realize that he wasn't such a nice guy before the coma. I saw a cop coming apart from the stresses of his job finding lost children. And again the tears.

I firmly believe that crying is theraputic. There are days when that is just the thing to relieve stress. I love the movie "Broadcasst News" for that very reason. Holly Hunter's character starts every day by unplugging the phone and crying for a couple of minutes. Then she's ready to start her day. I understand that.

But what, you may ask, does any of this have to do with anything?

Well, there are several things coming together here. Work is very stressful at the moment. Not awful-stressful, but more of the incredibly busy-stressful. There's so much to be done, so little time and resources to get it done with. And it's Christmas time. I've been feeling the lack of holiday spirit this year for some reason. And I miss it. It's starting to seep in with every passing day, with every tear shed to relieve stress, with every little thing I can do to make the world a better place.

You see, Fun Monday started an avalanche with me. Random acts of kindness are far too rare these days. People seem to be out for themselves. Have to get where they're going, get what they want, to hell with anyone who gets in their way. Getting there faster is more important than getting there alive or without killing or maiming someone else in the process. It's scary to think of the world my son will inherit one day.

Perhaps this is where religion comes in. Not as the commercial, fundraising enterprise so many "religions" seem to have become, but the spiritual side, the faith in something bigger than ourselves. I don't necessarily practice religion. But I do have a spiritual life that includes making each day the best I can for myself and for other people around me. I believe there is a little divinity in everyone and if they would only let it shine out, the world would be a better place.

My love of "Touched by an Angel" and music like Colin Raye's baffles some people, but those two things remind me that even I can make the world a better place. I only hope that they will remind other people too.


Mrs. Really Long Last Name said...

I adore Collin Raye! Great choice of a CD to listen to.

Haven't thought of that song in a long, long time.

I just listened and thought - that you never really know who you are encountering. We do need to treat everyone a little better.

Beautiful post, my friend. Beautiful

nikki said...

If only everyone would do random acts of kindness, the world would be a much better place to live.

karatemom said...

my therapy cry show is extreme home makeover, I cry every single show.

As for random acts of kindness I don't have much I can do but one thing I often do at christmas time is in the stores , any of the stores and often during this season. when standing in the long check out line I offer the next person in line to go ahead of me, its such a little thing but with most of the people crabby and cranky in the stores this little thing seems to really make a difference to most people. Helps their mood and really I don't mind.

try it ..its great.and something easy to do.

lisaschaos said...

I would love to see more kindness, I get depressed by the "me" attitude too. Love Williams and Raye!

karisma said...

I have done my fair share of crying the past two days, it must be something in the air. It started with tears of joy on Sunday as a friend had a baby and ended in tears of horror and disbelief which I will share with you all later.

Anonymous said...

I met country singer Mark Willis today. If you like tear jerkers, listen to "Don't Laugh at Me".


Anonymous said...

Jeez... not Willis, Wills.

Janis said...

I cry also, sometimes no reason that I can think of, it does make you feel better. All we can do as human beings here on earth is to live by the Golden rule, if everyone did this, think about how nice this world would be to live in.