Monday, October 19, 2009

Fun Monday - Bad Hair Day

This week's host is Sandy who wants us to relive those bad hair days:

You can usually tell when a woman is about to or has made a momentous decision or change in her life... Just look at her hair. If the hair has changed, something else has changed as well.

When I was a child, I had long, silky blonde hair. I don't remember which brother my mother was pregnant with, but mid-summer, she was HOT. Melting. She cut off her hair. My hair. My brothers' hair. I had a pixie, the boys had crew cuts. And we found out that we had kind of funny-looking heads. Little heads, big faces. Kind of like aliens. It was years before any of us had short hair again - and by then, my brothers' heads had grown so that their military cuts looked pretty normal.

Me? I grew my hair. But for trims to keep the split ends at bay, I didn't cut my hair. That pixie was fairly traumatic, apparently.

All through my teens, I had long hair.

I had long hair when I got married at age 20. It was not a good marriage. And I realized the turning point when one day, I walked into the bathroom, grabbed a pair of scissors, and cut the hair on one side of my head SHORT. My then-husband was aghast. And pretty angry. His idea of me was thin with long, long blonde hair. By then, that was NOT my idea of myself. I felt ugly and I felt like my outsides should reflect my insides. So I hacked my hair off. The marriage ended a couple of years later.

After I returned home, I let my hair grow again. It never got to the lengths it had before, but it was down between my shoulder blades. And on the thin side.

I finally decided to have what I wanted. I found my man. He likes long hair, but I've always loved BIG hair. Always wanted BIG hair. But it was the same fine, silky hair I had as a child, so I permed it.


Except it was also "fried" hair. My hair doesn't take kindly to perming or coloring. Everytime I did that, more would fall out. I tried to keep it up anyway.

Then I got pregnant. I kept the long hair as long as I could stand it, but finally cut it off chin length with bangs. I loved how easy it was, but I hated how it looked. After the baby was born, I grew it out again.

My hair wasn't the only thing that grew. So did my waistline. Long hair, big tummy.

And I finally realized something. I couldn't wear hair for everyone else... I needed hair that fit me. My idea of myself and how I wanted to live my life. So I tried it again. I got my hair cut short (for me) to just above my shoulders. And I LOVED it.

So easy to take care of. I didn't have to do anything to it - I just washed it, combed it and let it go. I could sweat and not feel weighed down by hair. I could jump in the shower and not have to spend time on it.

It's time to get my hair cut again. This time, my life is changing for the better. I'm becoming more active and long hair just doesn't fit my view of life right now. It may get long again sometime, but it will be my choice. Just as cutting it off is also my choice.

For me, that may be the biggest change of all.


The Church Lady said...

Good for you Sayre! I have always said, that I will never have a hairstyle that someone else wants me to have. After all, I am the one who has to wear it around all day!

I have been trying to let my hair grow longer for a change. But, with my natural curl, it takes forever!!

wendishness said...

Wow your hair has had its ups and downs hasn't it, but it's great that you have it how YOU want it now and that's the way it should be :)

margaret said..., love, love this post. I went through a very similar thing - I wore long hair because that seemed to be what was expected (not by hubby, he noted that it was my hair and I should do what I wanted) - but it was what I had had for most of my life.

Then, last year, I decided to heck with it - I hated it and I was going to get a style that worked for me. I got a beautiful short "razor cut" that is all different lengths, so it changes almost on a weekly basis as the hair grows out. And I have gotten SO many compliments on it! Most importantly - I love it.

Thank you also for your wonderful comment on my news. Such wonderful support from bloggy means the world to me.

nikki said...

I feel you on the hair. I cut all mine off and was the most freeing experience ever. Good for you.

Sandcastle Momma said...

Good for you. Being comfortable in your own skin (or hair) will lead to a happy life.

Swampy said...

This is what keeps the hair stylists in business...I'll never forget the look on my stylist's face the day I said, "Cut it longer."

Kim said...

Ahhh...the pixie cut. As you can tell from my post, I was very familiar with it. Hair is such an important factor in a woman's self esteem--whether we like it or not. When you feel like you look good, no I mean GREAT, you feel fabulous.

I'm glad you finally found yourself.

Anonymous said...

Long, short, fat, thin..your beauty has nothing to do with those things and beautiful you are, regardless of the externals. Love you any way your are. dad

Liane Michel said...

Yes, but you forget to mention the time you decided to dye your hair "henna red" in MY bathtub.


Another bloody Sunday. LOL!!

Gattina said...

I didn't know that hair could influence that much people's life ! I just accepted my hair as it was, for years I had a very light perm to put some waves in my streight hair, but since 10 years I don't do it anymore and I have still the same hairstyle.

Faye said...

When momma's HOT, everyone is hot and gets a haircut! This gave me such a giggle, Sayre. And, you're so wise to realize that even something as insignificant as hair can be used for control in a relationship. What a relief and joy to finally be with someone who is secure enough in himself that he doesn't have to play those little control games.

grace said...

you are hilarious, I liked reading your post. Thanks for stopping by Sayre. pray for both my babies, they are now both sick.
Take care