Monday, October 10, 2011

Mommy Frustration

My boy is not stupid.  In fact, he's a pretty smart cookie.  In spite of going to school at Hell Middle last year, he managed to keep his grades up reasonably well and passed 6th grade before we moved him to the much more heavenly Imagine school this year.

His school sends out grades at the end of each week so parents can keep up with what's going on in their kids' school lives and I've been pretty happy with his reports...  On his mid-term progress report he had A's with one B in Language Arts.  It was puzzling since Language Arts really is his best subject, but I didn't worry about it much.

Until I started getting his weekly updates.  He would have an A in that class too but for one thing.  He hasn't handed in his reading log since the beginning of school.  This one thing has now dragged his grade down to a D.  D! 

I am baffled.  He reads all. the. time.  He loves reading.  But for some reason he won't take a minute every day to note the book, the author, the page numbers or give a five sentence summary of what he read that day.  So far this year, this is the ONLY homework he's had!  And it does need to be done daily - but it's something he's doing anyway.  WHY?????

Last year, he struggled with overwhelming homework every night - but he did it.  He got it all done and handed in.  Do we need to put him back in that school so he'll actually do homework again?  I really don't get his thinking on this.

I created a form for him to fill out everyday.  This morning his dad and I made him sit down and fill it out for the weekend so he'd have something to hand in today.  But this has to end.  As of today, there will be NO computer time until he has done this.  EVERY DAY.  It's the only way to make sure this gets done. 

Please note, all you readers who are scratching their heads over this - I understand that my son is smart and making good grades.  There are people who would love their kids to make good grades and exhibit some smarts, even if they didn't do all their homework.  But this particular behavior is pure laziness.  He's actually doing the hard bit - the reading - so why not get credit for all the reading he's doing?  And why let something so simple have such a stupid effect on your grades? 

I can see that mothering a teen is going to be quite challenging.  Perhaps I have expectations that are too high - or maybe I don't.  I just hope we survive this teen-thing!

8 comments:

Island Rider said...

There is something about a middle school boy that I never understood even though I went through it twice. Why don't they turn in their homework? It is done, but they just don't turn it in! Is it rebellion? Laziness? Distractions? I never did get it. Once I went to youngest son's middle school for a week attending every class with him to remind him to turn in his homework at the beginning of class. He was mortified, I lost a week's vacation, and while it got a little better, he still "forgot" sometimes. Boys!

Faye said...

Would a really cool note/log book curl his tail?

~kAtHy~ said...

This post just transported me back in time to my middle school classroom full of students just like your son. This type of behavior will cause your hair to fall out and will make you want you to pull his hair out. Until documenting his reading becomes important to him, (no matter how important it is to you and his teacher), "it's ain't gonna happen" without either consequences or rewards or both. Not sure if he uses a Kindle or reader of any kind, but those devices, as you know, have the capability to make notes in the margin. Could his book be uploaded to one of these 'devices' and let him document his reading there ? If that isn't an option, try paper clipping or stapling a 'card stock' piece of paper cut to the size of the book to the back cover with a chart listing the date, page number, and room for notes. Tell him until the column for that particular day is filled out, there will be no food. Just sayin'. . .

joanygee said...

A printed form filled in by hand? Wouldn't a computer entered form be just as good? Or maybe a website to visit like goodreads? Hoping you don't mind these ideas.

Sandy said...

My daughter is having the same issues with her 6th grader. Incredibly smart, chaotically disorganized and just doesn't give a rip. When you find the answer, please share!

~kAtHy~ said...

OK. I'm back . . . this also reminds me of a brilliant student I had in 8th grade named Matt. He came to class everyday without his notebook, pencil, homework, etc. E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.Y. ! After about the 2nd week of school, I asked him what he wanted to be someday. "An attorney," was his answer. So, I called his mom to visit with her about the problem, which she was very well aware of. I asked her if she would consider buying Matt a briefcase, then told her my idea. It was to show Matt videos of attorneys preparing to present their cases in court with ALL their information organized on the desk in front of the judge, jury, etc. She was thrilled about the idea. I proceeded during the next few days to talk to Matt about his 'career' and how important it was to be organized and have all his 'homework' for 'court' ready. IT WORKED. That young man became one of my best students !
Moral of Matt's story: Finding his passion and developing a plan that fit the problem was the key to his success.

Jill said...

it's boys of that age. all of my nephews have gone through that, no matter how smart.

karisma said...

Its the name! They can't help themselves! He is probably not even being lazy, just forgetting. My Z forgets everything unless I remind him several times. Frustrating for me, but he is just far too busy all the time to remember 5 minutes ago. LOL Love Kathy's comments! Wny can't all teachers be like her?