Now and Again, I Try

I like my son. And there are other children that I like or try to like. But as a rule, I am not terribly keen on children. They're loud, messy, deaf (when you want them to do something), usually shrill and they irritate the heck out of me quite often.

I'm not sure why this is. Perhaps it's because I waited so long to have my kid that I was used to a more adult lifestyle - quiet. Neat. Free time. What WAS I thinking?

But all in all, I like being a mom. I do mommish things on occasion. Sometimes on purpose, sometimes by accident.

Tonight was one of those nights.

Darling Man was doing soccer today which means I'm a solo parent from about 1pm to 11pm, so I was drafted to pick up the GDK at her school. She spends Thursdays with us because her parents' work schedules overlap that day and it's a tough day to find a babysitter.

After picking her up, I went to pick up ZBoy from his school. Ran home to drop off backpacks and such, then headed out for the Scout shop. He joined cub scouts recently and tonight was the monthly pack meeting. It's been requested that the boys wear their uniforms to pack meetings, so we needed to get one. Uh oh. They have no uniform shirts in Z's size. They're on back order. So I get him a belt, a hat, a neckerchief with slide and Cub Scout t-shirt. It would have to do for now.

GDK's school was having Fall Festival tonight, and when I picked her up, she rather wistfully asked if we could go. I agreed, so after the uniform shopping, we went to Fall Festival. Bought tickets which would be used for activities and food. First activity up was the bouncy-thing (you know, get in jump around for three minutes, slide out dripping sweat). They had them split up for younger and older kids and GDK and ZBoy were on either side of that line. GDK jumped first and Z and I sat at a picnic table right next to it and watched the Karaoke being set up and the first singer climbing on stage.

GDK finished her jumping and came to stand next to us, gazing at the stage. "Would you like to try it? It's only 6 tickets," I told her. She shook her head vigorously. We went to have pictures with a cow.

Then Z had a jump and we drifted back to the Karaoke stage with GDK in the lead. By now, people were getting up there and belting them out - sometimes well, more often, uh... less than well (I'll be polite). Finally, GDK turned to me and asked, "Do you really think I should do it?"

I told her that if she wanted to, to go right ahead. "I'll be right here if you need me." She walked over, put her name on a slip of paper and the CD and track number of the song she wanted to sing, and then we all sat down on the concrete sidewalk and waited for her name to be called. Well, Z and I sat. GDK stood rigid like a toy soldier. I think she might have been holding her breath until her name was called.

Finally, the moment came. They mispronounced her name, but she went up there all the same. She grabbed hold of the mic stand and waited for her lyrics to come up. I was surprised that she chose I Still Believe, a Christian music song. The first verse was sort of mumbled into the mic, but she finally started singing. Very softly, but singing. Not at all polished, but her heart shone through as a little girl with a death grip on a piece of metal and a bad case of stage fright sang her way through it, mostly to herself.

Everyone clapped when she was done and she was absolutely shining as she clambered down the steps and came over to me for a hug. I am so proud of her for doing something she was afraid to do. Perhaps knowing that it was okay and that someone was there to catch her made it a little easier to try.

We did a few more activities and grabbed dinner (well, sort of. We didn't have enough tickets so I skipped dinner and the kids ate) and headed out for the Cub Scout Pack meeting.

Z had done his requirements for the Bobcat badge and received it tonight. That was actually a surprise, since as of yesterday, the badges hadn't come in yet. I was NOT ready with the camera as they started off with him and it was a very quick thing. But I did shoot a few of the ensuing fun. The dens split up to separate corners with adult volunteers and packages of toilet paper.

The project? Make the best mummy you can. Z's group actually mummified a mother and daughter together!

Jesse is in Z's den, so he came home with us after it was all over to spend the night. GDK's dad showed up around 9 to pick her up, and we were back down to two boys. They played video games for a bit, then I packed them off to bed (much protesting there, but it's finally quiet).

Darling Man came home from his game, beat. He watched the last couple of innings of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays vs. the Boston Red Sox and crawled off to bed.

Everyone is sleeping but me now. And I'm feeling quite pleased with myself. I pulled off this mommy thing pretty well today.


GDK and Me. We're doing the holding-the-camera-out-at-the-end-of-your-arm-and-shooting yourself thing. GDK's arm. My forehead isn't REALLY that big. And we're TIRED.